1. untitled

    Her hair was like the sun’s own tendrils 
    that gently fell to earth and
    caressed my face.
    But now the sun is distant
    and the earth is cold
    and my hair is gone. 

     


  2. that mountain feeling

    I live my life wearing rose-tinted shades.
    When the rain falls heavy
    and the wind blows cold, I see the sun.
    I see wildflowers blooming on the breath
    of the wide fields of the parking lot.
    I hear music in the low groan of the bus
    and in the scuffling of feet, grooving together
    as we dance on over to where you live.
    When I see the homeless man on the corner,
    I give him my change without counting it, and
    when I see you
    I get that mountain feeling.
    You know what I mean?
    Like I’m so high up and I see everything
    Earth has given to us and I just want to cry
    thankful tears and jump into the unbelievable majesty of it all.
    But what happens when I take the glasses off?
    When the rain blows sideways
    and the air makes your blood stiff, I wrap myself in blankets
    and wait for the sun.
    The parking lot is vast and black, no longer a meadow
    but a dark sea of bourgeois frustration.
    The bus ride to your house is long and crowded,
    the bus itself wheezing and coughing, inching toward you in a dispiriting limp.
    When I see the homeless man on the corner,
    I keep a hand on my bag and walk faster to your doorstep, and
    then I see you, and
    I get that mountain feeling.
    You know what I mean?

     


  3. untitled

    Word are lost symbols I cannot decipher;
    all meaning lost behind the curves and lines
    that hold nothing but frustration. 
    I feel everything. I cannot fathom it into words,
    this tidal  wave inside me
    which presses me forward and tosses 
    and turns me into debris, saltwater soaked
    and washes up at the mouth, crusty in the corners
    littered with popsicle wrappers and angry fists of empty paper,
    clogged so only cracks of white light leak through.
    I know I know I know
    but I don’t know what

     


  4. untitled

    I’ve lost all ability to express my emotions
    so now I channel them into TV and cigarettes;
    a few more braincells and my livelihood,
    brick walls I pave and stack alone and limping.
    I could build a fortress of hot, wet feeling 
    that dries and flakes in the sun.
    Will the sun stop shining 
    if I do not rise with him?
    I don’t know
    because I look at the sun everyday
    but I never see my light.
    So this is what it’s like to be a burn out.

     


  5. Haiku #60

    Who is that knocking
    on the iron vault that I
    built and call my home?

     


  6. I won’t finish this anyway

    I’ve been feeling so uninspired
    I’ve been feeling kinda lazy
    After 13 hour naps I’m still so damn tired
    and all my yesterdays are hazy
    Now I’m not trying to say I’m sad
    because I’m not, I’m really not.
    but this buzzing in my head is getting bad
    and echoes sounds of rot.

     


  7. Haiku #59 or Noah

    Water fills my nose
    and soaks my lungs as I drown
    in a flood of you.

     


  8. untitled

    A hole in the sun 
    leaked melted gold over
    the opal-encrusted earth
    that peeled back the layers
    of diamond and debris to reveal
    wiry grass like pubic hair
    sprouting on her body,
    and frozen soil caked to her worn face
    like old makeup.
    The hole grew and grew, and 
    more gold poured out
    till it filled every crevice,
    every fold of skin.
    It dripped off the mountains
    and filled the valleys.
    Wire was replaced with blades,
    and a fresh coat of green was applied gingerly.
    Her ageless lover, eternity himself, comes to
    place flowers in her hair which flows in long, winding rivers
    down her plump body. So it goes each year,
    though the two do not remember when they learned the ritual;
    the movements are encoded in their muscles, programmed like machines.
    Memory serves no purpose here. They do not worry about anniversaries or wayward children
    or about much at all really.
    They just keep dancing… 

     


  9. Haiku #58

    Jump a thousand feet
    live forever in the fall
    and land on a cloud

     


  10. Haiku #57

    There’s something I miss,
    head bowed to the water in
    an eternal kiss

     


  11. Haiku #56

    Being around you
    makes me feel so sad because
    I loved you so much

     


  12. Haiku #55

    Even though I’m a
    ghost, when your fingers brush my 
    face… I can feel it.

     


  13. 3:34 AM

    I tried to make words out of waves
    riding through my head the very same way
    your tongue burns my skin
    and the way your fingers carve rivers in my back
    and the way you dig tunnels through my heart and hit me hard
    the way you wanted your love to
    so it hurt the way you always did 
    and the way I always thought I did.
    I wanted the pain that came with your romance
    and I wanted to be your medicine and make all the bad go away,
    but really? The poison in me would have
    seeped into your wounded body
    and I would bring you down
    and I would be alone again.

     


  14. Haiku #54

    Will you join me as
    I dance in Hell’s doorway to
    the devil’s crooning?

     


  15. Haiku #53

    I keep my tears in
    vials on my shelf, labeled,  
    so I remember.